You guys thought I wasn’t gonna keep this blog thing up again, huh? In your face!
Here I am again, giving some life advice that I’ve learned from, well, living life.
First of all, I want to thank the people who have reached out to me regarding my previous posts this week; it means so much that my writing means so much to you guys! I’m glad my little mess-ups and lessons can help others. It’s what I’m here for.
I’m writing today to elaborate on some things I’ve mentioned in “The Blog is Back” post. It seemed to help a friend, simply being able to mention my personal struggles, so I wanted to bring to light ways I deal with those lil’ struggles.
The dreadful word – anxiety
I have it, you probably have it, we all have it. Whether it comes at times it’s supposed to come (like the panic that rises when a car pulls out in front of you or a bear chases you), or whether it’s kind of just there like a shadow or a big rain cloud following you around like you’re a cartoon character.
Anxiety. It comes, it goes, and it comes back as if it’s welcome here. In this busy, stressful, never-slowing-down world, it’s the thing that tells us we can’t, when we all know that we definitely can.
It’s a word you hear everywhere, from your family members, your friends, especially in school or even in the work place. A lot of people who don’t understand it probably say things like “there this person goes, whining about their ‘anxiety’ again — what a great excuse to stay home.”
Don’t listen to mean people, and don’t worry about what anyone thinks (easier said than done for someone who overthinks, huh?)
I’m here to show you that it’s okay to say that dreadful word, and that it’s okay to just need a breather sometimes because of that dreadful word.
Get rid of that fake smile!
People are supposed to think that you’re okay right? You wouldn’t wanna “burden” anyone with your mental health? – NO.
Stop telling yourself that people don’t care, don’t understand, or aren’t concerned about your happiness and healthiness.
Stop TALKING yourself out of TALKING ABOUT IT!
It’s a common question everyone gets asked: “How are you?”
And it’s even more common to simply say, “I’m good, how are you?”
If you’re not good, stop lyin’. Why you always lying?
Tell someone. Not just anyone, though. Tell the people who care about you the most because sometimes, the best help you can get when you’re anxious, upset, stressed out, and hurting inside comes from those who might can help you understand why you feel the way you do.
For me, being able to talk about it has been a game-changer. At my weakest point, my co-workers were understanding when they had to take a shift, my family checked on me over and over again, and my friends made sure I let myself have a little fun whether I liked it or not.
If you’re not okay, say you’re not okay. I know how hard it is, because you don’t want your loved ones to see you hurting, but it feels much better than letting it bottle up inside.
Eliminate your stress
The stress starts somewhere, and accumulates in other places. For me, it was job after job after job. I say yes to everything, especially if the opportunity seems great.
This might sound odd for someone who has anxiety. But you’d be surprised how many people struggle with this mental illness and can talk to as many people and be as go-get-em’ as myself. Anxiety wears masks, and its easy to put that mask on and say “Sure! I’ll do it!” before you know what you’re getting into.
Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE every single job I have right now, but I had to cut back my time for some of them temporarily. I’m going to be graduating this semester, and I want to keep my stress level at a minimum (if possible in one’s last semester of college).
Do not overwork yourself. Of course, you are strong, you can do anything you put your mind to, and you will succeed in all of it, but don’t let yourself go nuts over trying to do it all at once.
It’s 100% okay to say no, and it’s even more okay to give yourself some you-time. Give yourself a day or two off of everything. I can’t WAIT to discover what an actual weekend is again.
My problem has always been checking things off the list. The list gets so long and overwhelming that I can’t slow down until I’m done with all of it. I’m scratching “stress” of the list and replacing it with “Marlie time.” You should do the same. Not with Marlie-time but with YOU-time. Leave me alone, I’m having time to myself. (Kidding, but if you aren’t gonna leave me alone, let’s go on an adventure).
YOUR time is valuable
Being a busy person, it’s hard to find time where you’re not getting educated in what you’re going to do some day, or time where you’re not getting paid to do what you’re doing now.
Find/make time that you can simply enjoy, with positive people who value any time spent with you. Scratch “negativity” and “toxicity” off of the list, too. No room for all that.
The people you spend quality time with should make you feel good about yourself. Use that time with your loved ones and friends for fun, stress-free activities and affirmative conversations.
Another dreadful word – alone
Makes you instantly sad, doesn’t it? The word “alone.” Don’t let it!
I’ve learned after a few months of practice that alone time is good, essential to your health. Take a break from all of it. Alone doesn’t mean “lonely” and it surely doesn’t mean “dwell in your sorrows.”
After being diagnosed with anxiety, I’ve grown to appreciate being by myself at times. Your alone time is not a time to sit and go over all the things you should be doing in your head, all the people you disagree with, or everything you probably did (NOT DO) wrong today. Your alone time is a time to reflect on your life and the people who value it, and a time to value your own life.
Look in the mirror and say, “I kick ass, don’t I?” and mean it. Because you do.
So get yourself in check
Talk about it, eliminate things that influence it, choose your company wisely, and love yourself a little. Anxiety is a battle of the mind. But it’s your mind, and you can take control.
Other ways that have helped me “get myself in check”:
- Eating better
- Essential oils
- Breathing techniques
- Playing softball
- Giving up coffee (briefly of course) – 0/10 would not recommend this one
If I can do it, you can. If you’re reading this blog, you obviously wanna get yourself in check, and you’re in control of the mind that’s reading this blog, so get off your butt and do it!
If any of you ever need someone to talk to about your own struggles, I don’t have a PHd or ABCDEFG, but I am open to turning a talk about sad stuff into a day filled with fun stuff!
What I’m saying is, I want to be here for my readers. My contact information is on this site, and most of you know me personally. Reach out. We can kick anxiety’s butt together.
Thanks for reading!
Plain & Simple